The AFL Rules Committee last night has announced a spate of changes to our game,the most controversial of which is the replacement of the Sherrin with a cube-shaped ball.
“We’ve just had a really exciting round of footy with some tightly contested games,but something felt a little off.That something could ruin the state of the game as we know it – we could have coaches or even ex-players getting stuck into us and we just can’t risk that happening.” said AFL General Manager of Football Operations Steve Hocking.
“What the game needs is a bit more unpredictability and something to curb all of this scoring.Starting from round 13,players will be using a cube ball,with each face covering 71cm2in area.We’ve had the same ball for well over 150 years now and it’s about time we adapted the ball to modern times,for a modern game.”
“This will have the added benefit of improving our outreach at the grassroots level – people can’t always get their hands on a Sherrin but everyone’s got a cardboard box lying around somewhere.”
When asked if anything will be done to address ongoing holding the ball inconsistencies,Hocking replied “No,we just fixed that so we’ll have to wait another round or two to review things”.
“Also,behinds will now count as half a point in the last 4 minutes of the 1st,3rdand 4thquarter.Final scores will be rounded down to nearest whole number.Of course,if these ideas suck,we can always add some more rules to fix it up.”