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Full-back regrets antagonising Charlie Dixon before opening bounce.

The AFL Union of Key Defenders gathered virtually today to raise their concern about the Port Adelaide forward’s grey area bumps and general aggression.It is unclear what the outcome of the meeting was,but one anonymous player had this to say:

“I was just giving him a few pushes and telling him how good my dinner with his mum was,as I do for every opponent I play on.Every contest during the game,he pushed my head into the turf while saying some real nasty stuff.The umps saw it all happening but they said that they didn’t want to make him upset – it’s ridiculous.”

“I thought it was just a Showdown thing,but every defender today had a story about how they’ve set him off.I’ve taken many a cricket ball to the ribcage when I played for Victoria and I’ve woken up less sore than after a game of playing on that oaf.”

BPB is in no way suggesting that Dixon is a violent,angry man.He’s actually really nice and good at kicking goals and has cool tattoos.

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